Day 27: Staying Put

Tomorrow I'll be 31 weeks, which is exciting.  This baby is definitely a mover.  B and J have been able feel him move for awhile but in the last few days, they can see him move from one side of my tummy to the other and literally see a fist, elbow, or foot protrude out for a few seconds.   Baby Boy and I are getting closer to term slowly but surely even with continued contractions/pre-term labor.  I have a doctor's appointment on Wednesday so I'll keep you posted on my progress and hope my cervix is still stable.  We're hoping that's the case because the longer I can hold out on a hospital stay (the doctor will bring me in if my cervix shortens 5 more millimeters or contractions get more regular again) and the longer Baby Boy stays put, the better.

Today was a nice Sunday on bed rest, even with occasional contractions.  I read and listened to Conference talks while everyone was at Church, I played a computer game and read with B, and we ate a nice dinner my mother-in-law made.  J took B home so B can go to school in the morning and I'm staying here for a few more days so J can study and my mother-in-law doesn't have to run back and forth so much.   B will come back here after school so J can work and study and not have to take care of me.  It's a struggle to figure out what's best for all of us these days, and we don't want to stress B out anymore than we already have, so we'll see how this new plan works and go from there.  Wish us luck.  J's test will be over in two weeks (Pray he passes his state boards!) and I only have 5 more weeks of strict bed rest, so we'll just keep plugging along and doing our best even if it's a literal struggle for me to stay put sometimes. 

Day 26: A Needed Change

It's amazing how much a change in scenery can do for your morale when you're on bed rest.  I spend my days on a mattress in the front room of our apartment and then go to my own bed at night so there's a difference between my day and night routines.  I have a hard time sleeping as it is, especially because contractions and uterine irritability get worse at night, but I'm sure it would be worse if I didn't separate my days and nights and have a change in my day, especially when I have so little change and control in my life at this time.   I look forward to the daily change from bed to bed, but coming to my in-laws for the weekend has made a huge impact on my mental state. 

I'm still laid up and am still doing the same things to fill my day, but at least I have a different view and I got out of my apartment for awhile after being cooped up there for almost a month.   B loves being with his grandparents, and I really appreciate the help they've given us this month (and beyond).  I'm also glad they agreed to take me on this weekend so I can have a change.   Being here with B also allowed J to get some studying and a few other things done, and best of all, he didn't have to worry about  and take care of me and B for the day.  I think it helped lower his stress level a little bit, and I'm thankful for that.  Because J is less stressed, I am too and can focus on being still and calm so this baby can stay put for a long time still. 

Here is a shot of the sunset from their living room window.  What a lovely view!

Day 25: Escaping (Well, Kind Of)

After 25 days of being cooped up in our apartment on bed rest (besides trips to the doctor or hospital) I broke out and came to my in-laws' house with B for the weekend.  Not only will it give me a much-needed change in venue and scenery, it will give J the chance to study and to not have to worry about us for at least a little while.  I'm glad to be here and have a change. 

 

Besides leaving the house, some thing I've missed over the last 25 days include:

• Picking up B and holding him
• Taking B to and from school
• Dates with J
• Going to Church
• Cooking meals
• Shopping (not online)
• Couponing
• Going outside
• Cleaning and doing dishes myself
• Driving and going somewhere besides to see a doctor
• Helping and playing with B (without having to lay down)
• Walking around
• A good night's sleep (after resting all day and having occasional contractions, sleep is hard to come by).

Bed rest definitely helps me appreciate the little , and giving up these things is a small price to p when we'll get a lifetime of happiness from a new baby.

Day 24: A Change in Schedule

Like I said yesterday, we're trying to find a normal for life on bed rest, so even though I can't leave the house or perform household duties, I am trying to provide J and B with the support they need to get through this.  Of course they're giving me the help I need too, and by lowering my stress level, I have fewer contractions.  I love when B gets home from school and talks to me and I like spending time with J too.  They make my bed rest days go better. 

To provide them with support, I have added a few things to my bed rest schedule.  I added online grocery shopping and meal planning so J doesn't have to worry about those things and can focus more on what he needs to do to accomplish his career goals.  In addition to our reading time, I've added a game or play time with B.  After some melt-downs and a rough morning today with lots of anger and tears (I put syrup on his French toast), I've come to the conclusion that he needs more attention from me.  He gets a lot of attention from J and Grandma these days, but he needs to feel my love and involvement in his life.  We know he's just reacting to his circumstances, so I'm trying to step up his support system and give him a better outlet for his frustration.  Hopefully doing these things will help all of my boys (including Baby) while I'm on bed rest.

Day 23: Family Stress

I knew bed rest would take its toll on me, but I didn't, however, anticipate how life-changing this experience would be for my son and husband.  Bed rest is stressful for me because I'm worried about the baby 24/7, I can't give B the normalcy he needs while laying down, and I can't carry out my usual duties that help our house run and take pressure off of J.  I also don't like depending on J (and others) for all my needs and feel extremely demanding.  It's been hard for me to let go of some things, but I'm managing to live with messes like the ones below.  It's difficult to find a good balance right now while I'm down and out and because J is taking on so much, he is super stressed, and I know B is feeling a bit traumatized by all this too.  I hate how much my being laid up has disrupted their lives. 

 

Like I mentioned the other day, J is preparing to take his state boards but even with others' help, because he's been taking care of me and B, cooking meals at my demand, and doing chores, he hasn't been able to study much.  That's something he needs to do so he can pass his test and start working.  I can't help but feel that my being on bed rest a hindrance to his progress because he worries so much about me and is trying to be at my beckon call.  He's even mentioned that it was easier for him not to worry about my needs when I was in the hospital.   The stress while I'm on bed rest has caused  some tension, but I have to remember we're all just doing our best, and we have to cut each other some slack.  I know J is going out of his way to serve me, so all I can do is show my appreciation in return and help how I can.  Speaking of serving, if anyone has any SUPER easy meal ideas so he doesn't feel so burdened, that would be great.  I have some crock pot and casserole recipes he can throw together, but it's still stressful for him to do much meal prep when he's trying to study, work, and take care of his family.   

B has also been feeling the stress.  The poor kid has had MAJOR meltdowns the last two nights and even cried himself to sleep.  I can't help but feel he's traumatized and that it's my fault because I can't parent and function normally while on bed rest.  Adjusting to me being on bed rest has been difficult on all  of us, and I pray that we can find the balance we need to survive this AND get Baby here safely in as many weeks as possible. I'm just thankful that each day gives us a fresh start.  I'm also thankful for prayer which I know can get our entire family (including Baby Boy) through this difficult time.  This afternoon was much better, as I had dinner planned, B and I did our reading time, and we started taking down the Christmas decor (It's about time, I know).  Hopefully this trend continues and we can find a "normal" for life on bed rest.

Day 22: Learning a New Skill

While I don't know how easy it would be to audit a class and write papers as some people have suggested I do on bed rest, I have been trying to learn a new skill:  crocheting.  It's something I can do easily while laying down and my mother in law and You Tube videos have been teaching me how to do "the single crochet."  Right now I'm working on a washcloth for B, and we'll go from there.  But I'm hoping to make a baby hat or two before this little one comes.  It's fun to learn something new and to keep busy.  B went back to school today and I miss his company by my bedside already, but J has been here to talk to, and that's been nice.  I think my key to bed rest is just letting myself relax and keeping busy and positive so that I don't worry myself.  The baby and my cervix are still stable as of a quick doctor's appointment earlier, and that's all I can ask.  Stable is good and bed rest is doable, especially when I have activities like crocheting to keep me busy.

Day 21: 30 Weeks!

Baby Boy and I made it to 30 weeks today!  Yea!  Now on to the 31 week mark and beyond!  These last three weeks of bed rest, contractions, and hospital visits have been crazy, but even with that Baby Boy and I have managed to hang in there (and so have J and B).  I do not actually have a goal to make it X amount of weeks, I'm just trying to keep this baby cooking for as long as I can.  I'm comforted to know that if this baby were born now, he'd do a lot better than he would have at 26-29 weeks, when I started having issues.  We're just getting through one week (and sometimes even one day) at a time and then we go from there.  Three weeks ago, 30 weeks seemed a LONG ways off, but it's here, and so now we can work toward the next weekly milestone.   31 weeks, here we come!

Highlights of Week Thirty (28 week fetal age):

Baby's length is 15-16 inches and baby's weight is about 3 pounds. The head is almost 3.5 inches (8cm) in diameter. The feet are nearly 2.5 inches (6cm) long. The wrinkled skin is becoming smoother now. Brain is developing wrinkles and looking more like a mature brain. Brain cells forming The baby controls its own body temperature. Bone marrow is now responsible for red cell production, not the umbilical cord. These red blood cells will continue to service Baby's body by transporting oxygen and removing the wastes. Baby begins storing iron, calcium and phosphorus. Eyebrows and eyelashes are fully developed, and hair on the head is getting thicker. Head and body are now proportioned like a newborn. Hands are now fully formed and fingernails are growing.